To the untrained eye, I’m just an effortless blur of glossy black fabric, gold-and-red chiffon fluttering from my costume. It vanishes a second later as I twist into my next combination spin. Relief floods through me, and a smile tugs at the corners of my mouth. I launch into the air and snap my ankles together, arms crossed tight over my chest. My left leg reaches behind me, blade tapping. Once I’m airborne, muscle memory will have to get me through the rest.
I recite the toe loop’s takeoff technique in my head, then turn backward, preparing to spring off the ice. There’s no time to get excited yet.Įverything comes down to this next jump: the triple toe loop. One, two rotations, and I land strong, back arched. I take a steadying breath, then tap my toe pick into the ice for my double flip. It also comes right before the tricky triple toe loop. It’s not the highest-scoring element I’m capable of, but it’s a great way to get my feet under me at the start of my program.
His eyes bore into me as I turn into my first jump, a simple double flip. I catch sight of my coach, Alex, by the boards. I carve deep edges and quick, controlled turns in a winding, S-shaped pattern. I push thoughts of the large crowd in the stands, of my mom sitting among them, of how this is my first-ever Nationals, out of my head. I aim a smile at the judges before gliding forward, extending one leg behind me in a quick arabesque. The opening notes of my music drum rhythmic and low. Knots unfurl in my stomach and flutter upward, even though I just chewed a ginger tab to settle my nerves. I look down at the National Championships logo underneath layers of ice. Seven judges sit in front of me, fourteen eyes ready to follow my every move.īlack, glossy fabric encases my white skates, part of my one-piece costume. And with a major competition approaching, Ana must decide whether telling everyone the truth is worth risking years of hard work and sacrifice. As their friendship develops, Ana realizes that it's tricky juggling two different identities on one slippery sheet of ice. And when Hayden mistakes Ana for a boy, Ana doesn't correct him and finds comfort in this boyish identity when he's around. Once Ana meets Hayden, a transgender boy new to the rink, thoughts about the princess program and gender identity begin to take center stage. Still, Ana tries to focus on training and putting together a stellar routine worthy of national success. So, when Ana learns that next season's program will be princess themed, doubt forms fast. Twelve-year-old Ana-Marie Jin, the reigning US Juvenile figure skating champion, is not a frilly dress kind of kid.
Perfect for fans of George and Ivy Aberdeen's Letter to the World: a heartfelt coming of age story about a nonbinary character navigating a binary world.
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